I’m moving out solo this weekend! Yaaaaaaay! I can’t wait! And this move is so long overdue and I’m glad that it has finally worked out coz there’s only one building that I wanted to move into and a flat finally became vacant. I’m tired of having people all up in my business, of being disrespected, of not being listened to. I’m tired of having to tolerate other people’s unhygienic habits. I’m tired of my lazy ass landlord making false promises to renovate my flat. That’s the same song he came singing last week, “if you guys renew your leases for next year, I’ll make sure that everything will be in order by the time you get back in February” Yeah right! That’s what you said last year and we were foolish enough to take you up on your promise.

I’m tired of not having any privacy to live my life the way that I want to. I’m tired of leaving my takeaway in the fridge only to find that it has been devoured the next morning. I’m tired of having to share a toilet with 3 other people. I’m tired of not being able to have a peaceful siesta without idiots banging at my door every five minutes to borrow this that or the other. And I’m especially tired of KENYANS poking their noses where they ought not to, just to have something to gossip about at the next baraza at the “Kenya High Commission” (a fountain outside the library where Kenyans congregate). Last year I was having a clande with a chic (sikujua alikuwa ni bibi ya wenyewe! Really, I didn’t!) and some time later it went public and I got into a lot of shit! The dude’s the size of Batista! Lakini niliponea chupuchupu after a lot of diplomacy.

Any time there’s drama in this city, best believe that there’s a Kenyan or two involved to “tia chumvi” into the mix. I’m sure you know what I mean. I love my country and my people, but I hate some of our habits.

But the main reason why I’m moving out is coz of one of my housemates. We had a serious altercation earlier in the year, sometime in April. Even though that’s behind us now, a lot of stuff has happened since then and the beef has been hanging over us like a dark cloud. But that’s a story for another day. The only reason why I didn’t move out then is coz I couldn’t find a bachelor flat then, and I was tied down by my lease.

The flat is so run down, it’s even been nicknamed Prison Break! Complete with Scofield, Tancredi, John Abruzzi & C-Note. (A free autograph to whoever can guess correctly which inmate I was!) It has been dissed so much that no one wants to move here next year. Probably that’s why the landlord wants us to renew our leases. Coz he can’t find anyone desperate enough to want to have themselves incarcerated here.

So what am I going to miss most? I’m definitely going to miss my housemate Q, a dude I’ve lived with for two and a half years. Q has changed the way I think. He always has a solution to any one of my myriad of problems. Everything is either black or white. He taught me to simplify issues to their simplest form then deal with them. And he’s one of the funniest dudes that I’ve ever met, plus he has this ability to inspire guys to pull off some random plans like walking to the hanye at 2am.

I am definitely going to miss my room. It’s huge! It has lots of storage space and the best part is that it has a balcony facing the beach and the sun rises right into my eyes every morning! I usually don’t draw my curtains coz the sun is my alarm clock. Sometimes I stand at the balcony with a mug of coffee just to watch the sunrise. It.is.beautiful yaani words can’t even begin to describe it. You just have to see this for yourself.

sunrise with little fishing boats at the shore

I have enjoyed the better part of the last two years and the interesting relationships that we formed as housemates and the late night madness sessions. But I’m a big boy now, I’m entering a new phase of self discovery and this can only be achieved if I move out solo.

My new digz is a bachelor flat just a stone’s throw away from my current place but it’s on the side facing away from the beach. No more sunrises for me. My new bedroom isn’t as big as my current one, but I’ll finally have my own kitchen and fridge, my own toilet where I can stack all my magazines to read as I drop bombs over Baghdad every morning. I’ll have my own bathroom and bathtub (I hate bathtubs-I’d rather have a shower instead. But I can’t have everything!) It’s a secure building with surveillance cameras on every floor, a laundry room in the basement, underground parking which I can rent out since I don’t have a car. It comes with DSTV, tena that fancy one where you can pause stuff and resume from where you left off (I’ll have to buy a TV though-how do you supply DSTV bila a TV?) I have the option of DSTV or wireless internet. I can’t afford both, but right now I’m leaning more towards wireless internet.

But the best part of it is that…THERE ARE NO OTHER KENYANS IN THE WHOLE BUILDING!!! Thank the lord.

Just three more days and I’ll be outta here!


I’m trying to upload a new template onto my blog. So what I did is this. I saved my curremt template just in case, then I went to Edit template and deleted the HTML for the old template and copy pasted the HTML for the new one. But that didn’t work and I got this warning message instead:

“We were unable to preview your template. Please correct the error below, and submit your template again. Your template could not be parsed as it is not well-formed. Please make sure all XML elements are closed properly. XML error message: The content of elements must consist of well-formed character data or markup.”

All this maneno of HTML and XML is not clicking so if anyone knows how I can go about it, please email me on archer.quest@gmail.com and help me out!